Momma Glad and I were at our favorite diner....Old school NYC kind of place....Primarily Male waitstaff.....massive portions and a bazillion deserts. We sat down to order and our waiter swings by the table and begins his shtick. He was tall, loud and with more inappropriate bad humor per pound than anyone in the service industry i have encounted in the Big Apple. Now understand that my mom is a teetotaler....a total teetotaler. Never had a drop in our home. Just wasn't part of our life. So I wasn't sure how she would react to his first question.
Waiter: Hi mom what are we going to start with
Mom: I think I will have Decaf coffee with (He Interrupts)
Waiter: Is it gonna be Scotch on the rocks, Vodka and tonic? No you seem like a Gin and Tonic kinda gal.
Mom looks at me for a second and then responds
Mom: Yes and that's all I'm having...not eating tonight.
Waiter: (laughing) OK Mom i will get the coffee.
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